How About You?
I like a game of bridge, How about you?
I like to win by a smidge, How about you?
Even though they sometimes Pull off a coup
I like seeing old friends, making new, How about you?
I’m mad about No Trump, Can’t get my fill
Stayman and Transfers Give me a thrill
Holding hands that rate 2 Clubs, Not making any flubs
May not be new, But I like it, How about you?
I love a preempt too, May make them flop
A score of minus two, Might give us the top
The same applies For the Weak Two
I like potato chips, coffee and weekly tips, How about you?
I love to dream of slams, Maybe I’ll shine
I’d love to see your score Right beside mine
I can see we’re in harmony
Looks like we both agree On what to do
And I like it, How about you?
Sung to tune of How About You? by Barton Lane and Ralph Freed and introduced in the film Babes on Broadway by Judy Garland
Dave
Send in the Clowns
Isn’t it rich
Are we a pair?
Me here at last on the ground
You in mid-air
Send in the clowns
Isn’t it bliss
Don’t you approve?
You who keeps adding conventions
Me who won’t move
Where are the clowns?
Send in the clowns
Just when I’d stopped looking around
Finally knowing the game that I wanted was found
Making my opening bid with my usual flair
Sure of my play
No one is there
Don’t you love farce?
Your new conventions are here
I thought that you’d want to play my way
Sorry, my dear
But where are the clowns
Quick, send in the clowns
Don’t bother, they’re here
Isn’t it rich?
Isn’t it queer?
Losing a partner this late
In my career?
And where are the clowns
There ought to be clowns
Well, maybe next year…
Sung to the tune of Send in the Clowns by Stephen Sondheim from the musical "A Little Night Music" and made popular by Judy Collins.
Dave
My Partner is a champ
She loves a bridge game and never comes late
Won't use conventions she knows she will hate
She thinks that most are just a deadweight
That’s why my partner is a champ
She likes to brag up the other pair
Always plays fair
Viewpoints – No points!
For a fun game she’ll whistle and stamp
That’s why my partner is a champ!
Her 4-card suits are bid up the line
The wicked Mafia she’d surely decline
Waiting 2 Diamonds is her diamond mine
That’s why my partner is a champ!
She laughs when scores are super or thin
A life master pin?
No got. So what?
For a fun game she’ll whistle and stamp
That’s why my partner is a champ!
Sung to the tune of "The Lady Is a Tramp" which is a show tune from the 1937 Rodgers and Hart musical Babes in Arms, in which it was introduced by former child star Mitzi Green. This song is a spoof of New York high society and its strict etiquette (the first line of the verse is "I get too hungry for dinner at eight...") and phony social pretensions. It has become a popular music standard.
Dave
I must add to Cynthia’s story about our chance encounter in Rapid City, South Dakota.
In September 2024, my wife and I were in the lobby of the hotel where we had been staying for a tour of the area around Rapid City, South Dakota. I noticed this woman who I could have sworn I had seen before. Since we had moved from Connecticut less than a year ago, it was not obvious where I might have knew her from. Since the bus taking us to the airport was being loaded, I wandered outside to check on our luggage. However, I could not help looking over toward the same person while racking my brain how it was that I knew her. She was also looking back at me so after a short while I walked over and said that she was very familiar, and she likewise agreed. It took us a couple of guesses but we ultimately hit on the weekly Wednesday bridge game which I was relatively new to. As fate would have it, Cynthia and I would be seeing each other the next day at Centennial Hall!
Jack
This morning I saw an obituary notice for Jack Paarlberg. He was Rick's partner when I first joined the club. He always went to Florida in the winter, so that's when Rick asked if I'd be his partner. Jack was a nice man. He was always in a good mood and always ready to chuckle. He was patient and complimentary to an inexperienced player. He was a man of faith and was part of a weekly Bible study group. They'd meet at different places from week to week. One day he mentioned that he'd been to Bible study that morning. They'd met at Fast Eddie's restaurant. That struck me so funny because it sounded as if this serious group was meeting at a speak easy. I'm glad I had a chance to know him a little bit.
Penny
I'd like to second Penny's comments about Jack Paarlberg. He was my gold standard for Zero Tolerance. I'd ask him to play with a questionable player and If he couldn't play with them, no one could. They soon received a "Dear _____ " letter. I miss him.
Dave
Little story for you:
Around 40 years ago, four bored housewives got together once a month to get out of the house, socialize, and play the “sophisticated” game of bridge. We thought we were pretty hot, but we were not. As we chatted away, the most common words we heard were, “Its your turn!”
One month, someone couldn’t play and we asked a friend named Betty to sub. An experienced player, her comment to us was, “You people need bridge lessons!”
As it happened, a man called Dave was starting a bridge course at Centennial Hall. Perfect! We signed up! Nancy came to a couple of lessons and dropped out not being the academic type. Melissa, who didn’t like to be told what to do, also dropped out. Marion and I loved it and stayed through the formal course as well as the ongoing game and continual learning for all these years!
Dave and the game as well as all the other friends we have met at the Hall have enriched my life in so many ways! Brain stimulation, entertainment, camaraderie, friendship - all available at Centennial Hall!
Thanks, Dave, et al!
Cynthia
Dave's New Idea
An email from Dave with some ways
The website could add light to our days.
It would be so much fun
If we asked everyone
To contribute an original phrase.
A fresh page on the site, he suggested,
Is how the dark days can be bested.
So will you join in?
Let your brain start to spin?
We hope you'll be fully invested.
It need not be fancy or rhyme.
It need not take much of your time.
Tell us a bit.
Show us your wit.
There's no doubt it will all be sublime.
Tin Pan Alley will be the new page,
Channeling artists from an earlier age.
But we'll make our own name.
Be ready for fame!
At least on our own website stage.
We do hope you'll consider writing for Tin Pan Alley. It doesn't have to be anything long. It certainly doesn't have to be a verse. How did you learn to play Bridge? What's the best hand you've ever played? Do you have a nice story about someone who isn't with us any more? Is there a Bridge joke you've heard? Send what you have to me and I'll post it. Maybe we can give the winter days some added warmth.
Penny
St. James Bridge Club Blues
I went down to the St. James Bridge Club
Saw my old partner lookin’ bad
Sittin’ at a square black table
So old, so lonely, so sad
She wanted a different partner
To attach herself to a star
Someone who was a life master
She hoped it would make her go far
Her new partner quickly dumped her
When someone better came along
She bounced around forever
Now she’s left in this old sad song
I remember the day she dumped me
Said she needed to be free
She can look this whole world over
She’ll never find a partner like me
When I die, I want you to dress me
In a T-shirt, shorts and no socks
Put a copy of Bridge for Dummies
With me in my long black box
There’s only one way to have a good partner
And that’s the key to this game
If you want to be treated special
Then you’ve got to do the same
This is sung to the tune of The St. James Infirmary Blues which was first recorded by Louis Armstrong in 1928 and later by Cab Calloway. The best modern arrangement is by the Silk Road Ensemble, sung by Rhiannon Giddings. See it on You Tube. The origins of the song are unknown. It is discussed at length on Wikipedia.
Dave
The Zero Tolerance Blues
I had a friend named Ramblin’ Bob
He used to cheat, gamble and rob
He thought he was the smartest guy in town
Well, Bob got a bridge partner Sunday
She left in tears on Monday
They’ve got him in the jailhouse way downtown
He’s in the jailhouse now
He’s in the jailhouse now
Well, I told him once or twice
To follow the rules and always be nice
He’s in the jailhouse now
Bob liked to play his poker
Pinocle, dice and euchre
But duplicate was his favorite game
He got throw’d in jail, nobody’d pay his bail
The director said his excuses were all lame
He’s in the jailhouse now
He’s in the jailhouse now
Well, I told him once or twice
To follow the rules and always be nice
He’s in the Jailhouse now
Sung to the tune of the early folk song “In the Jailhouse Now” first recorded by the Whistler’s Jug band in 1924. It was popularized by Jimmie Rodgers in the thirties and again by Tim Blake Nelson in the movie O Brother, Where Art Thou in 2000.
Dave
Sweet Betsy From Pike
Now don’t you remember sweet Betsy from Pike
Who joined a nice bridge club with her partner Ike
She bought Bridge for Dummies as it said on the blog
And arrived nice and early with her big service dog
Ike bid three No Trump and Betsy made four
The next board they set ‘em and made even more
They made a small slam when her suit it did run
Betsy laughed loudly said “This sure is fun!”
Then Ike overbid game and Betsy fell short
The next hands went poorly but she was a sport
Then Betsy got tired, sat down to repose
And Ike he just gazed at his Pike County rose
She said the opponents gave her some advice
“There’s lots of conventions that are very nice
I think that we really must upgrade our game
That’ll help us get master points which is the aim”
They started with Flannery then Two over One
Puppet Stayman and Namyats would be lots of fun
Ike got discouraged and Betsy got mad
The dog drooped his tail and looked wonderfully sad
Now Ike missed a signal and Betsy gave out
Down on the floor she lay rollin’ about
While Ike in great tears looked on in surprise
He said “Betsy get up, you’ll get popcorn in your eyes”
Ike and sweet Betsy got married of course
But Ike gettin’ picked on obtained the divorce
Betsy well satisfied said with a shout
“I need a loyal partner, I’ll stick with old Scout”
"Sweet Betsy from Pike" is an American ballad about the trials of a pioneer named Betsy and her lover Ike who migrate from Pike County Missouri to California. This Gold Rush-era song, with lyrics written by John A. Stone before 1858, was collected and published in Carl Sandburg's 1927 American Songbag. It was recorded by Burl Ives on February 11, 1941 for his debut album. The melody is to the tune of the Irish song "Master McGrath," which made its way to America after the Great Famine of Ireland. Members of the Western Writers of America chose it as one of the Top 100 Western songs of all time. It has been adapted many times, most recently by Johnny Cash and myself (with apologies).
Dave